Episode 34: You’ve Got Fans – Building Confidence from Your Support System (Bonus Episode)

If someone asked you who your biggest fan is, what would you say? Do you even know that you’ve got fans? Your inner critic is probably screaming no at those questions, and that’s great for fueling your imposter syndrome. Not so great for building confidence. But recognizing this support system is a first step towards conquering that negative voice and growing your confidence.

In this episode, you’ll learn where to start in creating a support system of fans, and that they might be lurking in some unexpected places. And how choosing to see people who are better at things than you are as your inspiration instead of your competition can also boost your confidence.

Key takeaways from this episode:

• Recognizing your support system is a great step towards building your confidence, tu confianza
• You only grow up to the limits of your comfort zone before you need to increase that into a new comfort zone
• You have fans who appreciate your work, but your inner critic might be drowning them out
• Instead of comparing yourself to other people and how far they’ve gotten, you can use them as inspiration to test your own limits and create new goals

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In this episode

Other episodes you might enjoy:

• Episode 7 – Creativity is a Marathon, Not a Sprint
• Episode 11 – Diet, Cheer Squads, & Power Tools: Life Lessons from Weightlifting, Part 2
• Episode 12 – Progress, Gains, & Your Comfort Zone: Life Lessons from Weightlifting, Part 3

Transcript

[00:00] Paulette: Buen día mi gente and welcome to the Maker Muse Podcast, the place where child free Spanglish speaking mujeres fuertes are inspired to find their confidence, su confianza. And now it’s going to be called the Maker Muse Podcast for Child-Free Latinas. It’s a working title. I’m Paulette Erato, the Maker Muse, su musa.

[00:20] Buen día mi gente. Today we’re talking about how recognizing your support system is a great step towards building your confidence, tu confianza. Y eso, tu confianza in your decision, not just as a child-free Latine, but having the will to stand firm in all the choices you make, that’s what this podcast is all about.

[00:42] Also, I made mention of growing up to your boundaries later on in the episode. I should have expanded on that point. I don’t mean boundaries as in the ones you use to protect yourself, but more to describe the limit of your comfort zone.

[00:55] So when I say that you only grow up to your boundaries, what I meant to say is you only grow up to the limits of your comfort zone before you need to increase that into a new comfort zone. It’ll all make sense once you listen to the whole episode, which is super bite-sized today.

[01:08] You’re also gonna hear a metal straw sometimes banging against my glass because I was drinking a cold brew. I don’t even like coffee. But on this day I was drinking a cold brew when I recorded this training. And because I’m super casual in my trainings, sometimes the audio is going to include some sound effects. Enjoy.

[01:25] Today we’re talking about how you’ve got fans and how that can help you deal with imposter syndrome.

[01:31] Let’s talk about, you’ve got fans, just like you’ve got mail, you’ve probably got milk. There’s milk in my coffee. That’s what that is. So you’ve got fans. You don’t realize you have fans though because your inner critic is doing a number on you. I mean, sometimes in your better moments you’re like, oh yeah, people buy from me.

[01:52] People pay attention to what I put online. But most of the time you’re probably not recognizing those things. Instead, you’re so busy comparing yourself to other people and how far they’ve gotten. So let me tell you a story. These always come with stories. You get a free storytelling 20 minutes here, not an hour.

[02:10] I follow Kate Doster online. I used to, I did Kate Doster’s copywriting course. Over the pandemic, I could not work out. Not like I wanted to. I weightlift, you know this, I talk about it all the time. Well, Kate got into it while we were all in lockdown, like all of my gyms were closed. There was, there was no going to a gym.

[02:27] It was different where she lives, I’m sure. And she got really into power lifting. She’s got a three plate deadlift in less than a year. And that’s my goal. My goal is a three plate deadlift. I’m also about five or 10 years older than Kate, and I’ve been lifting for nearly 10 years, and I have never hit a three plate deadlift.

[02:46] That was my goal this summer. I’m still working on it. Yesterday I hit two plates again. Kate’s kicking ass. Kate is showing other people, other women that they too can be strong and lift and not all the baggage that comes with it. And if I were gonna sit here and compare myself to Kate, I could feel really bad about myself in a lot of different ways.

[03:04] Like I haven’t hit that three plate deadlift. I don’t look like her. I don’t, I don’t, I don’t, I don’t, sorry, I hit my straw. But what I’ve chosen to do instead, because these are choices. You can choose to compare yourself to the people who have exceeded your own limits, or you can use them as inspiration to create new limits.

[03:25] To create new goals. You can use them as evidence that that thing is possible. Like I always knew a three plate deadlift was possible, but here’s another woman showing me she’s doing it too. It’s awesome. So I choose to see her not as competition because again, who am I competing against? She actually does competitions. I do not. I go in the gym and I compete against gravity. That’s it.

[03:46] Anyway, I’m in a business development group and we meet on Mondays. And on Monday morning we all follow each other on Instagram and Instagram’s where I post where I’m kicking ass. I do, I post my weightlifting videos in there and you know, it was my turn to talk about whatever it was we were talking about.

[04:02] And before I could say anything, the moderator of the group was like, “oh my God, you are so strong!” That is a fact. So I said, thank you. And she’s like, I can’t believe how you do this. And it just started like this thing in the group where like they’re all watching me. I don’t know that they’re watching me. Like I don’t look at who’s viewing my stories.

[04:21] Like if I get a heart, I click to see who hearted it, but I don’t like go down the list. There’s only like 30 people looking at my stories. But it was these people and they’re all like, it’s so unbelievable. And I’m like, this is just evidence that you can do it too, if you wanted to. If you wanna do, I didn’t wake up that day and go into the gym with no training to be able to do that.

[04:41] This is years of training. This is nearly a decade of training, of moves forward and setbacks and all these things, and here I am being the person they’re looking at. I was like, I have fans. Just like you have fans, but you don’t recognize it because again, you’re too busy looking forward instead of looking back and who is watching you along the way.

[05:03] Now here’s, here’s a paradox with that. If you’re too scared to put your stuff out there, whether it’s your newest product or your newest artistic piece or whatever, no one’s going to know that they can be your fan. Okay? So you gotta put it out there in order to get fans. Now you might think, oh, it’s just my mom that likes my stuff.

[05:22] Your mother sat through how many hours or days of labor to push you out of her body and give you life. The least you could do is appreciate it when she tells you stuff that you do is good. Do not negate the fact that it’s just your mom or your family or whomever that likes your stuff, because they’re gonna like it anyway.

[05:42] So what? So what if that’s the default setting for family and friends that they’re gonna like it anyway? Those are your fans. How dare you denigrate your fans’ standing? Like these are your OG fans. Even if they’re the only ones seeing your art. Or your new product, if they’re your sounding board, these are the people who are supporting you.

[06:04] Respect that. And instead of minimizing how much you need these people’s support, be grateful that you have it. And if you don’t have the support of family or friends, who do you have the support of? Do you have a community that you have built? It does, it doesn’t even have to be something that you’re selling.

[06:24] I know, um, Sandy in this group got back into painting not too long ago, and now she’s got her stuff on clothing and house goods. She’s got like pillows with her paintings on it. How rad is that? And they’re really pretty. Now, it might not be your cup of tea, it may not be your style of art. But what are you doing?

[06:44] Show us! Because once you recognize you have fans, you can draw confidence from them. That will grow into your new comfort zone. You’ve pushed into, okay, I accept I have fans. These fans are gonna help me build up my confidence to the next level, to push out into the next level of my comfort zone. But remember, you only grow up to your boundaries.

[07:08] Unless you push through them. So let’s establish a limit, grow up to it, and then keep going, get you more and more confidence because that’s how you slay the imposter syndrome. Confidence. And you do that by recognizing where your competence lies and if you’re good enough for someone to say, wow, this is great.

[07:29] I love what you’re doing. You’re so strong. How can I be like you? Honey, you’ve got more than one fan. Because that was just the person that was inspired that day to speak up. I had no idea these people were like impressed by what I was doing. But here I am showing you that yeah, women can be strong and you don’t have to look like Instagram Barbie to be fit.

[07:53] I don’t look like Instagram Barbie, most of the time I come on here, I’ve got double chin, you know, I’ve got like the wobblies here. I I not important. I’m healthy and I’m strong. So yeah, you find confidence in competence. You can also find confidence when you are lacking it inside, in the people around you, in your support, in your community, in your fans.

[08:15] So anyway, your confidence can come from your fans, but we need to be your fans. All right, my friends. I hope you stay hydrated and that’s a burrito.

[08:24] Wanna talk about this week’s episode? Feel free to DM me on Instagram. My info is always in the show notes. And if you’re looking to be a guest in the future for the Maker Muse podcast for Childfree Latinas, check out the guest form on my website at themakermuse.co. Yes, themakermuse.co. It’s also linked in the show notes.

[08:43] And hey, muchísimas gracias for listening to yet another episode of the Maker Muse podcast for Childfree Latinas. Yes, that’s the working title. Are you subscribed? If not now would be a great time to do that. New episodes come out most Tuesdays. I’m on Apple on Spotify.

[09:01] Wherever you listen. And then can I ask you a favor? Please tell all of your family and friends about it, tus amigues, tu familia. Because if you love it, they probably will too. And I’d really appreciate it if you could rate and or review it wherever you’re listening to it right now. Hasta el martes. ¡Cuídate bien!